nice one...........just to read

Foolish man tells a woman to STOP talking,
But a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely
BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.

One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :
Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD
After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY

Three FASTEST means of Communication :
Tele-Phone
Tele-Vision
Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.

Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.

A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC

What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time ?
It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.

Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving
through a forest. They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says : we
should KILL him.
Ant 2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone.
Ant 3 says : No, we will just throw him away from our path. Ant 4 says : No, we
will LEAVE him because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.

If you do NOT have a Girl /Boy Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life.
If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.

Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their
MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.

When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to
free you from Darkness. Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.

Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.
Because as per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH a person TWICE for the
Same Mistake.